From: "Mark A Waeltz" Subject: Torn Date sent: Tue, 7 Apr 1998 13:36:14 -0500 Title: Torn Author: Shelly W. Rating: G Classification: V-vignette Mulder/Scully friendship Spoilers: Many Keywords: Mulder/Scully Friendship Summary: A song gets Scully to thinking Disclaimer: Neither Mulder nor Scully nor anything else X-files related does belong to me. I just borrowed them, and I am getting no money from this, so please don't sue. All X-files things belong to Chris Carter and Fox. No infringement is intended. The song belongs to Natalie Imbruglia and BMG music, again, no infringement is intended. ........................X........................ Agent Dana Scully had just left her basement office. It had been a long week, and she was glad that Friday had finally rolled around. As she pulled out of the parking garage, she turned on the radio. In a few minutes, a new song began. I thought I saw a man brought to life; He was warm, he came around and he was dignified; He showed me what it was to cry... The lyrics seemed to talk to her. It was like it was singing about Mulder. For a while there, before her big battle with cancer, Mulder had been so sweet and attentive. And he had definitely showed her what it was to cry. If they'd never met, she'd still be the logical scientist that didn't know about space aliens or abductions or government conspiracies. Most of all, she'd never have doubted that what she thought she knew wasn't right. Well you couldn't be that man that I adored; You don't seem to know, don't seem to care what your heart is for... Mulder had changed drastically when Kritschgau had told him it was all a lie. Everything he'd believed about aliens and what had happened to his sister so long ago had suddenly been snatched away from his hands and he was left alone. Scully had tried to help him, but slowly he'd changed. He barely ate, barely slept, and last week he'd even spoken out about his disbelief in aliens and brushed off Cassandra Spender's stories about abductions. Stories very similar to her own experience. Their roles were almost reversed. Today, though he'd seemed even more depressed. Well I don't know him anymore; there's nothing where he used to lie, conversation has run dry, that's what's going on; Nothing's fine Scully stopped at a red light, startled by how this related to Mulder and their situation. (Chorus) I'm torn; I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel; I'm cold and I'm ashamed lying naked on the floor; Illusion never changed into something real; I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn; You're a little late and I'm already torn... Scully stifled a sob and jumped when the car behind her honked. The light had turned green at some point. it was as if she'd just been enlightened to how Mulder must be feeling. Everything he held sacred had been torn away from him. So I guess the fortune teller's right; I should have seen just what was there and not some holy light; You crawled beneath my veins and now I don't care; I have no luck, I don't miss it all that much; there's just so many things that I can touch... As it moved into the chorus again, Scully turned and headed in the direction of Mulder's apartment. She couldn't rest until she was sure that he was all right. He should be home by the time she got there. There's nothing where he used to lie; my inspiration has run dry and that's what's going on; Nothings right I'm torn; I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel; I'm cold and I'm ashamed lying naked on the floor; Illusion never changed into something real; I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn; I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel; I'm cold and I'm ashamed, lying broken on the floor; You're a little late and I'm already torn; To-orn..... By the time the song ended, Scully was almost frantic, which wasn't like her. It seemed to take forever to reach his apartment, but when she did, she took the steps two at a time. She knocked at the door, her heart pounding. The suddenness of its opening startled her "Scully, what's going on?" Mulder asked surprised, but she could see that his eyes were tired. "Can I come in?" she asked shakily. He must of realized that she was upset because he got serious, "Sure. What's wrong?" She entered and he shut the door. "Mulder, I was just thinking about things, and I-I want you to know that I'll always be here for you." He looked concerned, "I know." She was frustrated with herself at not getting this out the right way. "And you don't have to go through everything alone." "What's happened Scully?" he stood facing her. "It's just that whenever something's bothering you, you block everything-me out. You can talk to me, and even if you don't want to talk, I be there. I'll be here for you Mulder." Her blue eyes searched his hazel ones. "I know how things these past few months has changed everything that you believe, but I don't want them to change you. I can't let it because I need you too much." He stepped forward and embraced her. Wiping a tear off her cheek, he whispered in her ear. "I need you, too." FINIS e-mail please! At ShelW1215@yahoo.net . P.S. I like to think that someday the words "need" and "trust" spoken between Mulder and Scully will be replaced by the word "love". "God grant me the serenity to accept things I cannot change, the courage to change things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." -Unknown