Date sent:        Sat, 1 Nov 1997 16:11:50 -0500
From:             Margi Kleinjan <100343.166@compuserve.com>
To:               gossamer project <submissions@x-philes.com>

Title: Hopeless
Author: Margi Kleinjan
Rating: R
Classification: SR
Spoilers: Tempus Fugit
Keywords: Mulder/Scully romance
Summary: Skinner and Krycek unwittingly play cupid.

Disclaimer: I don't own Mulder or Scully or Skinner or Krycek, as 
you may have guessed. Lucky old Chris Carter and 1013 and Fox 
own them. 
Feedback: To <100343,166@compuserve.com>, please.
Spoilers: Tiny little Tempus Fugit spoiler, and references to Dod
Kalm and Home. Nothing major, so don't be put off, unless you're 
a Pendrell fan.
Notes: I've discovered that if you're ever stuck for a fanfic idea, 
a holiday someplace cold and conversations about Bill Pullman 
will always help. Add a few fanfiction cliches, et voila!
Dedication: To Missy, whose conversations with me, and film-fests 
with Anna-Karin (Run Forrest, run!), inspired me to write this. It's 
her fault. <g>

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Hopeless        
By Margi Kleinjan
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Winter 1998, Wednesday afternoon

Scully stood outside Skinner's office like a teen rebel caught 
smoking behind the geography block would stand outside the 
principal's office, waiting for the stern voice to call her in. She 
leaned against the wall, avoiding eye contact with Kimberly and 
nervously clenching and unclenching her fists. Skinner had called 
Mulder and her down to see him. But he was speaking to them 
seperately. Scully waited for the authority's voice, secretly 
worrying what was going to be said to her, but never letting down 
her usual countenance of SuperHuman Scully.

But it was Mulder, leaving the office after his own little meeting 
with Skinner, who told her to go in. Scully tried to read the look 
on his face for the split second before she turned to enter. 

He was wearing a slight smirk, but looked a little bit 
uncomfortable, and seemed relieved to be out of the office.

Scully found herself sitting in the chair opposite Skinner's desk 
before she realised she'd even walked through the door.

"Agent Scully." Skinner's voice was like glass. "Do you know why 
you've been called in here?"

"Well, I assume it's to do with the fact that Krycek...."

"Scully...." Skinner cut her off. "This is to do with you and Agent 
Mulder, and a certain amount of... tension in the workplace lately. 
I'm sure you've heard the rumours circulating recently?"

"Baseless..." Scully began, but Skinner cut her off again.

"I don't expect you to give me any other answer in the situation; 
you know the bureau rules concerning relationships."

Scully frowned. "Sir, am I to understand that you believe Agent 
Mulder and I are...."

"I'm not accusing you of anything, Agent Scully." Skinner paused 
and gave a little cough, and shifted in his seat a bit. "Off the record, 
though, I feel I should ask you a question. You're not obligated to 
answer, but I think you should answer truthfully, should you choose to."

"I'll try, sir." Scully said, with a little apprehension in her voice.

"Should the situation be presented to you, would you consider 
persuing a romantic or sexual relationship with Agent Mulder?" 
Skinner sounded like he was reading from a script. He'd probably 
said the same thing to Mulder, and afterwards, Scully wondered 
if he'd been rehearsing it.

But as she sat there, rooted to the spot and mortified beyond belief, 
she felt herself flush, and her legs went numb and cold. She 
stammered slightly.

"You're not obligated to answer." He repeated. "Are you going to, 
Agent Scully?"

It took a while for the words to register in Scully's brain, but when 
she tried to speak, her throat felt dry. "Uh.... Uh, well...." She 
managed. Skinner was getting uncomfortable now, which was 
actually a little comfort to her. But not much. "Well, ass... assuming 
you're talking hypothetically, and without our jobs in mind, then 
I.... I... would say, no. I find it highly unlikely I would love Agent 
Mulder in any way other than platonic." 

Skinner took a deep breath. "Thank-you." He said. "Now, about 
Krycek....."

It was as much as Scully could cope with not to burst into a 
fit of senseless, fatuous and downright mortified tears of 
embarrassment and shock. But she bit hard on the inside of 
her cheek, and tried to stop the fuzziness in her ears.

"That's all, Agent Scully. Sorry." Skinner mumbled and Scully 
staggered out of the office.

Mulder was waiting for her outside, and the sight of him made 
her stop being Just Dana, and returned to SuperHuman Scully 
mode.

"Are you ready to go? I'll drop you off at your place first and 
you can pack, and then I'll pick you up."

"Sorry?" 

"The case? Didn't Skinner tell you?"

"Uh, yeah. I just faded out a bit."

"He caught you out with that relationship thing, huh?"

Scully smiled faintly and nodded the tiniest little nod that only 
Mulder would notice. "So, what's the case?"

"Well, they've seen Krycek living somewhere up east. We get a 
full week of stakeout, and then we can arrest him if he's doing 
something suspicious. You'll need seven days clothes, and...." 
Mulder stuck his hands in his pockets and began to walk away. 
"....I hope you can swim, Scully."

"What?"

"Never mind."

"Mulder, tell me. What did you mean by that?" Scully followed 
Mulder down the corridor and out to the carpark, but he said no 
more about it.


*~*~*~*

That night

"It's smaller than I imagined." 

"It's a boat."

"Krycek's chosen a waterside home. I hope there's enough room 
inside."

"It's a boat."

"You're a navy brat, aren't you Scully?"

"Don't get me wrong, Mulder, I love boats. It's just... small. And 
it's the middle of winter."

"Oh now Scully, I'm sure we'll find a way to keep warm." Mulder 
said, throwing his bag onto the deck and climbing aboard. "Need 
a hand?" He asked Scully as she approached the waters edge.

"I'm fine." She said, boarding the boat. She remembered Skinner's 
earlier question, and her lie for an answer, and blushed. She 
hoped Mulder didn't notice. "Where's Krycek staying?"

"I got a map somewhere." Mulder answered, climbing inside 
the cabin. Scully followed him in. "See? It's not that small, is it?" 
He reassured her.

"Got the map?"

"Yeah, it's just here. So what did you say to Skinner?"

"Hmm?" The question surprised Scully, and she accidentally 
slipped off the bunk she wasn't quite balanced on.

As she picked herself up, Mulder asked, "When he asked you 
The Big Question. What happened?"

"If you want to know my answer, then you'll have to wait until 
I'm dead and buried." Scully said. 

"That's fair enough. But you don't get to know my answer."

"Okay." Scully agreed, somewhat reluctantly. It was only fair, 
she told herself, but a tiny part of her wanted desperately to 
know what Mulder thought of her.


*~*~*~*

Early hours of Thursday morning

Mulder lay awake, freezing under his sheets, and trying to find 
a comfortable position in which he could warm his toes up and 
fall asleep again. "Scully." He whispered.

"What?"

"Are you awake?"

"Shut up Mulder, this isn't camp. I'm trying to sleep."

"Are you entirely sensible?"

"Not even slightly."

"Tell me what you answered to Skinner's question."

"Fuck off, Mulder. I'm *that* sensible."

"Sorry."

"Okay. Goodnight."

"It's morning."

"Shut up."

"Okay."


*~*~*~*

Later that same morning

Scully woke up to the sound of the cabin door banging against 
the doorframe in the wind. "It's cold!" She yelled.

"Sorry." Mulder was outside, clutching a pair of binoculars. 
"Hey Scully, Krycek's up."

Scully pulled her robe on and crawled out onto the deck. 
"What's he doing?" She asked, her eyes still blurry with sleep, 
but her body fully awoken by the shock of the cold. 

"Eating breakfast. I'm hungry, Scully."

"Did you bring any food?"

"Sunflower seeds. And half a chocolate brownie I found in the 
back of my fridge. Hey! We were in a rush!" He defended himself 
as Scully gave him one of her Looks.

"Well you'll have to find some other food, 'cause that chocolate 
brownie won't last me a long time." Scully said, clambering back 
inside, shutting the door *properly* behind her. 

She vaguely remembered speaking to Mulder in the middle of 
the night, but it was difficult to remember what they had talked about. 

Crawling back into bed, defeated by the cold, she lay back into 
just the right position so she could watch Mulder watching Krycek.

Camp. She definitely remembered saying something about camp, 
but she couldn't quite recall. Reality was mixed with a thousand 
confusing dreams which filled her senses every single night, and 
she occasionally found herself wanting to continue conversations 
with the real Mulder, that the Mulder in her head had started while 
she slept.

Scully pulled the duvet up to her chin, and realised she had been 
holding her breath. She hoped that Skinner hadn't been pulling 
a secret lie detector test on her when they were in the office. 

She wondered what Mulder had answered to The Big Question. 
She decided she would be offended if he'd answered the same 
as her - the way Mulder looked at women wasn't really that selective.

But then, she'd answered no when she meant yes. What else 
could she have said? Skinner certainly wouldn't have let her continue 
to work with Mulder if she'd said that she wanted to...

This started off a whole other chain of thoughts and Scully clutched 
the blanket tightly with her trembling fingers as she forced herself 
to remember why she was there. 

She reached over and pulled the blind down, and started to get 
dressed. Her clothes had been packed at random in a hurry and 
she only had a tiny vague memory of what she'd actually brought. 

She found a big, thick green sweater which she usually only wore 
when nobody would see her. But it was warm, and Scully was cold. 
A match made in heaven.

Fully dressed, Scully poked her head out of the cabin again. 
"What's he doing now?" She asked, joining Mulder crosslegged, 
staring out across the water.

"He's reading his paper. He's just left half a bowl of cornflakes." 
Mulder said hungrily, licking his lips.

Watching him, Scully suppressed a whimper and curled her knees 
up to her chin. "Hungry, Mulder?"

"Mmm hmm."

"You want me to go into town, get some *real* food?"

"Would you?"

"I'll be back soon." 


*~*~*~*

Later on

Mulder turned to look back inland and saw a small figure wearing 
an oversized sweater, and struggling with a box of groceries.

"I'll take those." He said, as she reached the jetty.

"Thanks. So how's Krycek?"

"He's fine. He's watching TV. I wonder what's on." Mulder said wistfully.

"Never mind that. Anything suspicious?"

"No. I think Skinner's just sending us on a wild goose chase to 
get us out and about a bit more."

"Oh, you're right. Our job is normally so monotonous and indoorsy." 
Scully said sarcastically as she climbed aboard.

"What food did you get?"

"Normal stuff. Bread, milk, butter, chips, cheese, chocolate - nothing 
much."

"Well, maybe we should eat out some."

Scully ignored that comment and took up the binoculars. "Hey, he's 
talking on the phone. Have we tapped his line?"

"No."

"Well, maybe we should."

"Okay. What's he doing now?"

"He's still on the phone - don't you ever feel guilty watching people 
on stakeouts?"

"No. Well, not when it's Krycek."

"Hmm. I'm hungry. Take the binoculars."


*~*~*~*

Thursday, early evening

"Can I have a chip, Scully?"

Scully looked up from the blank space she'd been staring at. 
"Hmm?"

"What are you thinking?" Mulder asked, taking the bag from her hands.

"Nothing. I was just remembering our previous experiences on boats."

"Don't worry, I brought plenty of Evian." Mulder smiled, not at his 
own joke, but at the smile it brought to Scully's face. "Sculleeee?"

"What?"

"What did you answer to Skinner?"

"Ask me some other time, Mulder. Preferably when I'm drunk and 
stupid."

"Did I see beer in that box you bought?"

Scully smiled. "Yes. But not enough to even get me mildly tipsy, 
I promise."

"So one won't hurt, then?"

"One." Scully agreed. "What about you?"

"I don't drink."

"Just one."

"My mom used to warn me about women like you. 'Just say no', 
she said."

"I hate to drink alone." Scully said persuasively.

Mulder paused, "Okay. Just one then."


*~*~*~*

Friday morning

Scully opened one eye, wondering where she was. She could 
see her bunk, empty and the bedclothes in disarray. She wondered 
why she wasn't in it.

Sitting up, her head met a ceiling of sorts. Far too low, she 
thought, groggily, as she remembered she'd been drinking the 
night before. 

On exploration, she discovered she was lying underneath Mulder's 
bunk. Mulder wasn't in the bunk, it seemed - he was outside.

"Hey, look who's up."

"You're considerably bright eyed." Scully muttered, burying her 
chin in her sweatshirt.

"Well, I'm not the one who finished off five out of a six pack 
last night. Someone can't hold their beer very well, can they?"

"I don't normally drink that much, you know."

"I know." Mulder said. "I should have stopped you, shouldn't I?"

"Well, this is the middle of a potentially important case. Speaking 
of which, what's Krycek doing at the moment?"

"Well, I haven't actually seen him today. I'm not sure where he 
is or what he's doing. I called Skinner, to keep him updated - are 
you okay, Scully?"

"Yeah, I was just wondering... what did we talk about last night?"

"Nothing." Mulder said, looking away.

"Mulder, just tell me." Scully said impatiently.

"Really, nothing. You were pretty much out of it." Mulder smiled 
at the memory. "But you didn't anything revealing, if that's what 
you mean."

Scully breathed, relieved. "So, what's on the agenda for today?"

"Well, I thought - just for a change - that we could sit out in the 
freezing cold weather, staring at a criminal through second rate 
bureau binoculars."

"Sounds great." Scully said. "You want me to take a shift now? 
I need to wake up a bit and you look like you've been out here for 
ages."

"Okay. I'll just be inside if you need me." Mulder shut the cabin door.

Scully let out the biggest sigh she'd ever released in her life. "I 
need you." She whispered, somewhat pathetically in her own 
opinion, and closed her eyes.


*~*~*~*

When Scully woke up, Mulder was handing her her coat. "Scully, 
we got some action. Krycek's got company."

"Huh?"

"Put your coat on, we gotta follow Krycek."

Scully clambered to her feet. "What's going on?"

Mulder leaned in and spoke slowly. "Krycek - is - leaving - with 
- somebody. We gotta follow him."

"Okay. Where's he going?"

"We won't know until we follow." Mulder said. "Get into the car."

Scully silently did as she was told. "How long was I asleep for?"

"I'm not sure." Mulder said, starting the car. "But I was out there 
with you for nearly and hour and you were asleep when I got 
out there. Feeling better?"

"Much."

"Hey, there's Krycek." Mulder said, gently swerving the car in 
behind the shiny red rental car with Krycek and his mysterious 
friend in the front seats. 

It was just starting to get dark, and Mulder and Scully followed 
Krycek through the town centre. 

"Where's he going?" Mulder muttered to himself.

Scully gasped and her eyes lit up. "He's going there!"

"The bowling alley?" 

"No, no look. Open air ice skating."

"Ice skating? *Krycek*?"

"Who's he with?"

"I don't know. Do you think maybe Krycek has a date?"

"It's plausible. I mean, he's no hunchback of Notre Dame, is he?"

"Why, Miss Scully, I do believe you have a crush on Mr Krycek." 
Mulder said with an amused smile.

Scully smiled back. She knew she was getting into dangerous 
territory, but she was enjoying it. She decided to just sit back 
and enjoy the ride. "Is that a hint of jealousy I hear in your voice, 
Mr. Mulder?" She asked.

"Do you *want* me to be jealous?" Mulder took a dive straight 
into the crap. Scully raised her eyebrows.

"This isn't about me. This is about *you*." 

"No, it's about *you*, and what you said to Skinner."

"Oh Mulder, let it go, will you?"

"Okay. But will you answer one question truthfully?"

"That entirely depends on the question."

"Did you answer Skinner truthfully?"

Scully paused, reflecting over a possible answer. "Well..." She 
said slowly. "If I tell you that I answered untruthfully, then you can 
presume that I told him no, since there's no reason why I'd tell 
him I wanted to sleep with you if I didn't. But if I told you that I 
answered truthfully, then you have no way of knowing for certain 
what I told Skinner, considering that I could have told him either 
answer truthfully, and you can't deduce just from my answer to 
you whether I told him yes or no."

"That's not answering my question."

"I told the truth." Scully said, hoping her voice didn't give her lie 
away.

"What did you tell him?"

"Mulder!" Scully raised her eyes to heaven. "Shouldn't we be 
watching Krycek?"

"Oh Scully, he's just on a date. Nothing sinister. So, you told the 
truth, huh?"

"You know, truth is a tricky thing." Scully said. "How do we really 
know what the truth is? Maybe what we think to be the truth is just 
what our mind is telling us is the truth - only what we want to be the 
truth, and not what actually is."

"That's cleared a lot of things up for me, thanks, Scully." Mulder 
said with a frown. 

"Hey! You wanna go skating?"

"Oh, no. Not today."

"Come on, Mulder, it'll be fun."

"No Scully." But Scully had already got out of the car. Mulder 
climbed out and spoke to Scully across the roof. 

"Why not?"

"Because it's cold."

"You'll warm up. You'll be moving about." Scully walked over to 
the desk and asked for the boots. Mulder followed over. 

"How do you know my shoe size?" He asked as she passed him 
the boots.

"I don't know." Scully shrugged. "It's just one of those things I know. 
Get your boots on."

"You amaze me."

"Isn't that what that guy said to Winona Ryder in that film?"

"Possibly. How come you don't want to skate?"

"Oh Scully, I'm a *horrible* skater. I have *no* sense of balance 
- please don't make me."

"I'm not exactly brilliant either. But I'll help you. Come on, we never 
have much fun, do we?"

"Sure we do, Scully. Remember that time we got stuck in the 
pigpen? That was kinda fun. And when we went out for your 
birthday last year. That was fun."

"Mulder, that was the night Pendrell got shot. That *wasn't* fun."

"Okay, so maybe that wasn't very fun."

"You're going to skate with me." Scully said, finishing lacing her 
boots and starting to lace up Mulder's for him. When she was 
done, she rose to her feet and took Mulder's hand. "Come on."

"Oh Scully."

"You'll never learn if you don't try." Scully said, already on the 
ice. Mulder cautiously put one foot onto the white ice, and then 
the next one joined it.

Scully took his other hand, and started to move backwards. 

"Erk... Scully..."

"Bend your legs a little." She said. "You really can't skate, can 
you?"

"Rub it in Scully, why don't you."

"Sorry. Hey, see, it's easy." Scully said, letting go of Mulder 
for a split second before they both realised they couldn't stand 
up alone. 

Scully grabbed Mulder and steadied herself, and for just the 
smallest moment, they thought they were balanced. 

Mulder fell, and Scully's attempts to save him and herself 
worked at first, but concluded with the pair of them falling in 
the opposite direction, and lying, bruised and wet on the icy 
surface.

"Aw, Scully, looks like you spoke too soon." Mulder said, 
sitting up. "So, uh, how do we stand up?"

"Well, I'll stand up first, and then I'll help you up."

"Okay."

They found that this was easier said than done. 

"Hey!" Scully yelped, as she finally found her balance. "Mind 
where you're putting your hands!"

"Sorry." Mulder muttered. "I'm too cold to be polite. Give me your 
hands."

"Okay." she gasped, pulling Mulder to his feet. "Now. See what 
everyone else is doing.... you have to kick your foot out behind 
you like this, and keep moving."

"Scully," Mulder said, from the safety of the side railings, "You 
think I don't know that? You think I haven't watched people skating 
like that all my life? I *can't* skate, Scully."

"Sure you can. You just have to put what you know in theory into 
practice." Scully momentarily lost her balance again, but 
remained vertical. "See, not even I'm perfect." She said.

"Of course you are, Scully." Mulder reassured her. "Now help me."

Scully paused for a moment before reaching out for Mulder's hand, 
and pulling him out into the rink. "I bet you can make it all the 
way around without falling over."

"Your blind optimism is very refreshing, Scully."

"Shut up, Mulder." Scully said, speeding up.

"Hey!"

There was a small part of Scully which was screaming 'to hell 
with dignity. Throw yourself down right there into that ice with him 
again and have some *fun* for once in your life.' But the rest of 
her was helping Mulder learn to skate, which seemed important 
to him.

There was a small part of Mulder that wanted to learn how to 
skate. He wanted to be able to do this one thing which Scully 
seemed to enjoy so much. But if he could skate on his own 
two feet, then he probably wouldn't get so much contact with 
Scully. And even if she thought he was a really slow learner, or 
she was a really bad teacher; he was feeling a little too selfish 
to let go just yet.

Krycek was having the worst date of his life. Or at least, the worst 
date of his life had just ended on a very sour note. He sat at the 
side of the ice rink, eating a cheeseburger and slurping on a 
soda, and watching the feet of the people - mostly couples - who 
were going around and around the ice. He was mostly staring 
blankly, not much taking in what he was looking at, and he had 
not noticed Mulder and Scully.

"You're getting better." Scully said.

"I'm not." Mulder said hopefully.

"Yeah you are."

Mulder proved his point by falling over, taking Scully with him. 
"See." He said.

Scully was enjoying the fact that they were lying so close, 
even if her limbs hurt and her clothes were wet. "You're a fool." 
She whispered.

For a moment, her face felt hot as she gazed up, deep into his 
eyes. But then people started to get a bit annoyed that the pair 
of them were just lying in the way, so she averted her gaze and 
struggled to her feet.

"Do you want to get something to eat? A burger or something?"

"Sure, okay." Mulder agreed, and they awkwardly skated around 
the outside of the rink, and left it by the fast food counter.

"Two burgers please." Scully ordered, taking money from her 
coat pocket. She handed one of the greasy, paper wrapped 
'delicacies' to Mulder.

"Thanks. You wanna sit down?"

"Are we going to skate more after we've eaten?"

"I don't know, do *you* want to?"

"Well, I am pretty tired. Maybe we should just go back to the boat. 
Unless you really want to continue this lesson - only I don't think 
I can take the strain any more." She smiled. ~Yeah, and *he's* the 
fool~

"Okay. Bon appetite, Scully. Scully?"

"Sssh. Get your head down."

"What? Why?"

"It's Krycek - he's just over there."

"So?"

"Well! What if he sees us here and then tells Skinner? It's just 
the kind of thing he'd do. And after that little inquest in his office 
the other day, I don't think he's going to just dismiss it."

"Well what do you suggest we do?"

"Follow me." Scully took her burger in one hand, and crawled 
really low along the row of tables surrounding the rink. Mulder 
followed, and soon they were out in the carpark.

"Well that was stupid."

"Let's just get back." Scully said. "I need a rest."

"Okay."


*~*~*~*

Later that night

"Hey, can I come in? Are you decent? It's freezing out here."

"Yeah, sorry. Come in." Scully opened the door to the cabin 
and Mulder clumsily found his way in and into bed. 

Scully climbed into her own bed and began to read.

"Thanks for teaching me to skate today, Scully."

"It's okay Mulder, you needed the help. Anyway, I enjoyed myself."

Mulder rewarded her with a smile, and she felt her heart melt. 

Never once losing eye contact, she put her book away, and 
slid down in the bed, slowly and seductively.

Then, very, very slowly, she ran her tongue over her bottom lip. 
She wasn't quite sure what she was doing, but she was definitely 
sure her brain was no longer operating from her head.

She gave the tiniest moan as she shifted into a more comfortable 
position on the undersized bunk, and couldn't help wishing she'd 
brought some of her more... interesting nightwear. The pyjamas 
she had chosen weren't exactly revealing, but by the way Mulder's 
eyes were scanning her, she guessed they were flattering.

And although she was enjoying the hungry look on Mulder's 
face, Scully decided she should probably stop herself while 
she still could, a decision she was immensely proud of in the 
situation.

"G'night, Mulder." She said, dimming the light and closing her 
eyes. She lay perfectly still, half her brain wondering about whether 
she was still in her right mind, the other wondering what Mulder was 
thinking.


*~*~*~*

At about one the next morning, Scully found out. "Mulder, what's 
going on?"

"It's driving me crazy Scully."

"What is?" she asked apprehensively.

"Will you just tell me what you told Skinner?"

Scully paused. "I lied, Mulder. I told him 'no'. What about you?"

"Well, when have I ever been entirely honest with Skinner?"

"You lied to him?"

"Actually, I told the truth. But the outcome was the same."

"Oh."

"Y'know, I don't see that it's any business of Skinner's anyway."

"No. It's nothing to do with him." Scully was breathless. "What 
we do. What we... what we choose to do."

"Should we choose to do it..." 

Without either of them realising what they were doing, they met 
in the middle of the cabin, bodies pressed closely together; 
skin against skin, hot against cold. 

The combined feel of Mulder's tongue against her own, and 
of the tips of his shockingly cold fingers against her heated 
flesh stirred up feelings inside Scully that she wasn't sure were 
entirely legal.

And then they were on the floor, and Mulder was removing her 
nightclothes and his own. With little noise, he tenderly kissed 
Scully everywhere he could get his hands on, and Scully 
responded with a growing wetness which Mulder soon thrust 
himself into.

She came quickly, at almost the same time as he did. 

And instantly she realised what she'd done. She had just changed 
her life forever. They both had. 

As Mulder slid out of her, he made the same realisation.

Neither spoke, but they instinctively moved together, and held 
each other close for comfort. "Mulder." She whispered, her chest 
heaving and her head pounding.

He didn't answer. She didn't want an answer. Instead he held 
her tighter, both holding the foolish notion that as long as they 
remained where they were, they would never have to deal 
with the consequences of their actions.

The gentle rocking of the boat on the water lulled Mulder soon 
to sleep, but Scully was wide awake. She transfered the blankets 
from Mulder's bed down onto the floor and covered him, 
wondering if she should stay with him, or seek comfort in her own 
bunk.

Of course, she never actually intended to leave Mulder's side, 
but she was trying to keep her mind busy.

Burying her face against Mulder's soft skin, she thought about 
facing work on Monday. Krycek was living a perfectly innocent 
life, and she wasn't. She couldn't even imagine talking to Mulder 
when he woke up, let alone going to work with him, and sitting 
in Skinner's office with him, all the time while Skinner suspected 
something was going on, and images of that night flashing through 
her mind...

She felt her tears squelching between her cheek and his shoulder, 
and that was the last thing she remembered thinking before she 
fell asleep.


*~*~*~*

Saturday morning

Mulder awoke first, a shiver running through him as he realised 
his toes were poking out of the end of the blanket, and just how 
cold he was. Then he noticed Scully, and memories flooded 
back to him. 

Against his better judgement, he sat up slightly to wake her. 
She stirred, and it took a few seconds before she opened 
her eyes and looked up. 

"Mulder," she said simply. She didn't know how to talk to 
him any more. "Is this... Are we... I mean..."

"Scully..." 

It was just a word. It was just her name. Not even the name she'd 
been called for most of her life - but it was enough. 

"...Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Are you?"

"I think I got bruised. After iceskating."

Scully smiled. She had been wrong. Skinner and the FBI relationship 
policy were wrong. A couple of minutes of passion hadn't changed 
them. Nothing had changed - she was still Scully and he was 
still Mulder, and both of them were still lousy skaters. 

"I love you, Mulder."

"Thanks, Scully. I love you, too."

That was all that mattered.


--End--

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